hing! I was weak. I was…evil. And when I looked at you, I was afraid. I thought, What if you turned out like me? What if I ruined you, too? What if you hated me for what I’d done? Maybe you’d be better off without me. Maybe… if I took myself to the grave, you’d have a chance to be better, to be stronger than I ever was.”(不!我不值得被原諒!我說的話……不是想開脫任何事!我……弱,我……我邪惡。當(dāng)我看到你,我……我好怕……我記得我在想:如果你和我一樣怎么辦?如果我毀了你怎么辦?如果你因?yàn)槲?img src="http://m.kuw6468.cn/wzbodyimg/YwtzzN.png">的事
而恨我怎么辦?或許沒有我,你會(huì)成長(zhǎng)得更好。或許……如果我把自己帶
墳?zāi)估?,你才有機(jī)會(huì)成長(zhǎng)為一個(gè)比我更好,更
的人。)
湯姆的聲音沉得比剛才更低:“You thought leaving me alone in an orphanage would make me stronger? You thought that was love? Do you know the kind of life I had there?”(你以為把我留在孤兒院能讓我更好、更?!你以為那就是
?!你知
我在那里經(jīng)受了什么嗎???)
梅洛普更加焦急,微微向前傾,
珠急切地打轉(zhuǎn):“No, Tom! It wasn’t love. It was fear. It was guilt. I was so consumed by what I’d done, by what I was, that I couldn’t see anything else. Not even you. And I will carry that regret with me for the rest of my existence.”(不,不,湯姆!那不是
,而是恐懼,是愧疚。我被我犯
的罪行吞噬了,被我是何等樣人的意識(shí)吞噬了,其余的……我什么也望不見……連你也幾乎望不見。我永遠(yuǎn)、永遠(yuǎn)都要浸溺在遺憾、恐懼、愧疚里……)
湯姆默默凝望梅洛普——那個(gè)他以為遺棄、憎恨、背叛他的母親,此時(shí)如此不堪一擊,晦暗的靈被悔恨與自責(zé)壓得匍伏在地……匍伏在他腳邊。